The (Super) Power Of Cuddling

I did a bad thing. I was messing around on the internet when I accidentally clicked my history tab where I see list of web addresses I visited quite recently. There’s this website with a lot of videos of a lot of adults having fun with each other, and on top of the homepage, there’s this search button which features lots, lots of “routines”. I was feeling rather gloomy that night when I realised I needed a little bit of amusement to mend my shitty state of mind. I knew I was up to no good when I started putting keywords into the search box, lots of “good” results came up and there I was, streaming away ….

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But then I paused and an evil thought occurred, I could actually do whatever they were doing in the videos on my own. I could be part of these amusements in the comfort of my own bedroom and have all the fun in the world with my very self. And so my mischievous brain starting to set about to make that happen. Terrorised by guilt, I opened another tab on my browser and succumbed to a Hollywood tabloid page whose breaking news was “the best Kim Kardashian has looked since she got pregnant”. Not amused, especially when knowing Kim K would still be married to Kris “gigantic” Humphries when she gives birth to Kanye’s baby, I laid on my back and began to celebrate my (beautiful) thoughts.

There’s almost nothing in this world that a cuddle won’t soothe. I know for a fact that I’d rather be in the arms of the one I really love for a lifetime than having a steamy sexual rendezvous with the hottest guy on this planet (even though that hot person is Enrique freakin’ Iglesias). In time of desperation, I think cuddling and kissing should not be used as a prelude to sex. Well this may sound a little sappy, but a hopeless romantic like myself believes that cuddling is a way of saying “I know how you feel” and “I want to make you feel better”. That comforting sensation and feeling understood are probably the biggest rewards compared to  that orgasmic, temporary release you usually have after a random hookup. There comes a time in a person’s life when he thinks he has had it all, but the ability to surprise ourselves is what makes us different. A man who can transform the way a woman feels about something into a jovial one is one hell of a man. By cuddling her that is. A man who doesn’t just think “let’s hurry up and get down to the good stuff”.

Staring at the ceiling for almost a good fifteen minutes, I immediately got back to my slightly tainted browser where I saw a lot of gory pop-ups, and boy, didn’t they look painful to me. Not trying to act like a saint or anything, but I guess that I’m just an appreciator of yet another art form. Now I remember following Tera Patrick on Twitter and realised even a freaking sex goddess like her has a very soft side just like every other human beings. Who would’ve thought. Cuddles, for the win.

The Art Of Letting Go

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You know the drill, either when you hit rock bottom or when you can’t seem to forget what has happened in your recent life history, you’re told to let it all go and yeah, move on. It’s not just about dwelling on the past, it’s also about not wasting your time on things (and people) who don’t deserve your attention at the very first place. You’ve read it in magazines, you’ve heard it from motivational speakers who sometimes are just as miserable as you are, or even your best friend who at times is the one carrying a backpack full or rocks (not literally of course), your past is screaming so loud you can’t even hear what your future is trying to tell you. These things below are almost unseen but if you think about it, they make your burden a hell of a lot lighter.

1) Stop hoarding

I was once a compulsive hoarder. I collect just about everything, from movie tickets, old magazines to pointless price tags ( I convinced myself that I have a rare hobby). This does not include the dresses that I never wore, the watches I collect that make me look like I have ten hands, the shoes that I bought out of vanity and the (pretentious) books i thought would make me look smarter but you can’t always keep them all. When you let unnecessary things occupy a large space in your life (almost literally), you’re denying other new good things to come along. Sell, donate or give away the usable things you don’t need anymore. Something very simple could mean the whole world to some people. You don’t need to keep those memorabilia given by your ex lovers. Plus, the dust and termites can’t do you any good, can they?

2) Make up your goddamn mind

Aren’t you just tired of being asked to know exactly what you want? The good news is, you must also be sure of what you don’t want in your life and maybe you’ll stop attracting jerks or people who toy around with your feelings. As for me, I don’t let people to “babe” me when I know they’re the last people I want to be associated with. Be stern to bad people. Compromise no more. Let them know who’s the boss

3) Create your own rant channel

Some people succumb to music, which in a lot of times, helps a great deal. Some people go to movies alone and some people write poems <—- I swear by this. Whatever it may be, you can create your own channel to vent or rant, for as long as you stay away from Facebook or Twitter. Deal with your problems, don’t tweet of Facebook it, nobody wants a glimpse of your negativity and you only make yourself look like an uneducated idiot if you make personal attack publicly. Fake your positivity if you have to, it’s still a lot better than bashing people aimlessly. Write a journal or have a secret blog or something. Oh there’s also Befrienders if you want to talk to “someone” anonymously.

4) Know your place, know yourself

Positivity and motivations are good and sometimes you aim for the moon which is sooooooo unreachable unless you’re an astronaut. What I’m trying to say is we have to be realistic and know what we can have unless we’re solely depending on miracles to happen. Stop wanting something so unattainable. Start small and embrace mediocrity. You can dream big but come on, you have to be one hell of a man to have a girl who looks like Charlize Theron. Know your match and don’t waste time on something that you’ll never have. Start anew

5) Just …….. forgive

You know how many times you were counting on getting back the money you lent to some ungrateful people, for instance. I think the moment they seem to “forget” the mere fact that they owe you something, you can kiss the money goodbye. We spend a lot of our energy on being stressed and pissed off about being cheated for so many things, be it about money, relationship or work. When you learn to forget about it all, new sense of happiness kicks in. Think of those few years you spent holding grudges, those years should’ve been spent by living your life, hate free.

5 Types Of People You Don’t Want To Be Today

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The escalator blocker

When common sense is not too common, you can easily be one of those ignorants who remain stagnant on the escalators blocking people’s way. Well, don’t be. If you’re unlucky you could get yelled at by a very pissed off girlfriend whose boyfriend is too scared to tell you to move your ass off the way because they’re late for a movie on the 6th floor. Stand on left, move on right side (if you’re in Malaysia). 
 
The double-parker
I would never, ever date anyone who double-parks his car (unless it’s a life threatening emergency involving bathroom visits). To me, it says a lot about a person. Either he’s a cheapskate for not wanting to pay for a parking fare or he is a selfish prick. Of course i’m so gonna judge someone who double-parks his vehicle. 
 
The one who doesn’t pick up the tab
You are better than this. One does not simply ask a girl out and doesn’t pay for the bill, really. You will make the worst kind of boyfriend. It’s different when the relationship is going steady and we sometimes split the bill, but this one is an absolute NO. Uglier is when you try to chat up a girl in a club, trying to get her slightest attention but never offer her a drink. You’ve got to be kidding
 
The keyboard warrior 
Everyone’s online these days. But do you walk the talk? Or you’re just bravely typing those words behind your online persona, trolling and hating on things that don’t even matter to you? Or you think of someone you secretly hate and look him up religiously for whatever reason you only know, or better yet, anonymously comment on people’s blogs and say unpleasant things? 
 
The one who kisses with the eyes open
I can’t scientifically prove to you why, but people who kiss with their eyes open are not to be trusted. I mean really, who does that? 
 

How To Instantly Feel Good When You Feel Like A Plastic Bag

Reach out to your posse

Apart from your true self, your homies know you best. What makes you tick, what makes you laugh and what turns you on. Share a dessert or two and see if that does the trick

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Wear happy colours (something that flatters your body that is)

Ditch the depressing black, brown and everything in between. Think cadmium yellow and hot magenta. That’ll cheer you right up.

Watch whichever episodes of FRIENDS

I don’t know anyone who does not laugh at Chandler’s jokes or Joey’s lame ass pick up lines. If you don’t have the complete DVD set like me, hit YouTube and watch just an episode or two.

Play the catchiest tune on your playlist 

You are who you really are when no one is watching. So just hit the play button, dance and sing along to your favorite tunes. Who cares if it’s Backstreet Boys or Britney. No one’s judging.

 See any movie that has Sacha Baron Cohen (or his voice)

From Ali G to a racist, a flamboyant homo and a dicktator, tell me another human being on this earth who can do what he does. One does not simply depreciate a crazy talent like this one.

Stop slouching

If you’re reading this while you’re seated whether on a sofa or an arm chair, straighten your back comfortably and aligned your chin at a relaxed angle. Good posture decreases stress to your body, in case you haven’t noticed.

Exercise! *note to self teehee*

It’s no rocket science is it? A more helpful advice has never been given. You’re welcome :)

Because It’s Not (Usually) About You

Think of those times when someone doesn’t respond to you the way you want, how often do you actually overthink about the whole thing? You first reaction would be “What have i done wrong?”, “Why didn’t I get the job?” or “Why am I still not losing weight?” and you sulk the whole evening trying to figure out what could’ve possibly gone wrong on the other side.

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You first have to understand that it’s not (always) about you. The world can really work in some ridiculous way sometimes. While others might find it too corny, your personality has to scream “There’s nothing wrong with me” and you must cut yourself some serious slack. Maybe your weighing machine is not accurate and not showing what you expected or maybe the girl you’re after thinks you’re out of her league so she decided to stay away? Or maybe the company didn’t hire you because they think you’re over qualified and outrageously intimidated by your larger-than-life persona? It can’t always be you. You aren’t the only one praying for snow galore with a cherry on top.

Get over yourself. Is it you? Maybe. But don’t we all suck at something?

Are We Oversharing?

Now, if the first thing you do when you wake up is check your Facebook updates, what do you mostly see? Some poor people will see lots of babies’ vomit, constant rage about some grumpy women having PMS or even a gory picture of a severely damaged ankle. Then it doesn’t quite end there, you see just as awful stuff on your Twitter timeline too. It is full of complaints, vanity, hatred and it has simply become a platform where we excessively vent just about everything. The time and energy we consume on venting can easily be used for fixing the issues itself, don’t you agree?

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I like cute things. I like when my good friends post photos of their gobsmackingly beautiful toddlers and the innocent things they mumble about. I also have some really annoyingly positive friends whose smiles are infectious and updates are exciting or inspiring, and that makes me all chirpy and cheerful. What i find less attractive is when I see photos that make me feel… painful in the stomach, almost literally. Think about the time where you almost throw up either by seeing updates about potty training or when you’re bombarded by photos which are self captured …. in a bathroom. Not to forget the kind who post EVERY single thing they do, like George Clooney once said, life wouldn’t be personal if we share it.

I remember a real incident where a girl caused a not so little stir on Twitterverse because she thought she had lost her car in a shopping mall. The very moment she panicked and her car was nowhere within her sight, she tweeted something something she shouldn’t have tweeted, or to be more precise, she shouldn’t have tweeted at all. In the moment like that: a) Don’t you think you should be focusing more on the most important thing i.e FIND YOUR CAR,  b) What exactly do you want your 20k something followers to do?, and c) Why the dependancy on social media, you seriously think  society owes you that much when you yourself didn’t do what you had to do to find your car? The public outcry didn’t end there, the person actually misplaced her car or something. Imagine the responses that she has received. Outrageous.

Some of us think it’s rather silly to post photos of every little thing we eat. I honestly don’t do that, but thanks to Instagram (which is already a part of Facebook) some people don’t actually touch their food until it’s Instagram-ed! There are so many internet jargons these days to accompany what we post daily. I do however enjoy nice culinary updates from people who know good food and are great in kitchen, I don’t think we mind these kind of posts.

Okay, okay, we get it, you’re happy. But sometimes we do wonder who are these “happy” people trying to prove  to, themselves or others? Conversations between two lovebirds should stay in their mobile phones and not wall post or exchange of tweets. At the end of the day we choose what we want to see and respond to, just like how i urge my friends to send message directly to my phone or inbox instead of asking me things on a wall post or status comment. Do I want the world to know that i’m meeting them at whatever time it is? Let your (smart)phone serve its’ purpose, to connect.

At the end of the day, social media is like your second phone or email, you check it regularly but do we want to know what other people think of other people (and not in a good way) and how much their entire wardrobe costs? Maybe not.

Things We’re Sick Of Hearing (Because They’re Super True)

“Drink lots of water”

I know. One of the most annoying things they usually tell you, but truer advice has never been given, especially when you’re not well. I’m not going to tell you why it’s good to drink lots of water because it is already written everywhere on the planet, but I can tell you that most of the good looking people (and healthy) drink lots of it. Unless you’re on no water diet like Hugh Jackman while filming Les Mis, you should really heed this advice. Need more reason? Start with how water eases your bowel movement.

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“If he likes you, he’ll call you”

News flash: He’s just not interested (but you don’t want to hear it). A man is never too busy to call you if he really likes you. Well some guys just can’t be arsed to call, simply because they’re busy with …….. errr some stuff. So let me save your time right here, right now. Either he’s got some real issues or he’s just not that into you <— I just had to say that one!

“Everything happens for a reason”

My blood pressure doubled in an instant every time I hear it. This usually comes from rather philosophical bunch of people, because they know what exactly they’re saying. Of course everything happens for a reason, you don’t just break up with someone and not meet anyone new after that, right? Nobody wants to hear it simply because they don’t wanna put up with the nagging that comes with it and you hate it when the nagger is right.

“Don’t sweat the small stuff”

This piece of advice is normally given by people who are kind of sick of hearing the problems you’ve been telling them. It is also an egocentric philosophy that disregards a lot of unnecessary thinking. You know you’ve been thinking too much (about unimportant stuff) when your best friend tells you this. You know he’s right.